Omaha

I am now in Omaha, doing the job search thing there. I definetly am going through the whole nesting, setting things up, not really wanting to actually look for jobs. Tomorrow I have to go to the coffee shop to try and figure out what is up with my brothers internet. Hopefully when I walk down there, some of the other shops in the hood will have help wanted signs and I can get a little part time work going. Except working is going to be this super strange feeling. That is all I could think of as I was putting stuff in my new closet and hanging up suits. The thought of having to put a suit on again and dressing up and going to work feels strange.

It will be super nice to connect with old friends again as well. Going to dinner tomorrow with one of my college girls tomorrow and get to meet her boyfriend. Excited about that.
Also excited about how encouraged I feel by my brother and his wife. Encouraged to find a job but also encouraged to create and be crafty and use the other skills that I have. I have a feeling I am going to like it here alot.

Motivation

Last night my church family prayed for me and the next step in my journey. It was amazing as the people around me prayed for me to find a job, to be safe and comfortable in Omaha.
One of my friends prayed for motivation. As I listened to the words he spoke I realized how important that prayer was to me. As I look forward to the next stage in my life I know that my need to motivate myself and keep myself going is the main thing that is going to stand between me and any success I have.
I have realized more and more what things motivate me and am excited to get comfy in my new room and make a motivation wall.

I am excited to have space to create kids clothes and work on art and photography and crochet and just create. And get a job and make money and hang with friends and their beautiful children. I am excited to see what God is going to do and where we will be going together.

I want to find a job that allows me to dabble in lots of things that I like to do. Or find people to finish things out for me.
I like to take pictures but I don't like doing much with them except posting them on Facebook. :) And I want a nicer camera, which was going to be my reward for finding a job in LA but since that isn't happening I am not sure when it will.
I like making things, like clothes and scarfs and blankets, but I have never sold anything and a few shirts that I have made I like too much to give away (I am worried that the people won't appreciate them)
I like writing or at least have a lot of good ideas for different things, websites, books, articles, etc. but am not the best writer and would prefer to just come up with ideas and outlines and have someone fine tune it for me.

I really just need to surround myself with people that are supportive of my craziness and keep me going and motivated. I also need people who tell me that I CAN.
I go through these phases where I stop doing what I love because of the thought that someone else is better at it than me, that I am not good enough. I need to push those thoughts out of my mind and get to work.

And now I feel motivated but am tired so maybe I will work from bed and when I fall asleep I will be done.

Today

Today I will do things that I enjoy.
Today I will be a productive member of society.
Today I will work on both things I need to do and things I want to do.
Today I will eat regular meals that are healthy for me.
Today I will not let my laziness determine what gets done.
Today I will not be distracted by silly things.
Today I will refrain from slacking my way through cover letters and job applications.
Today I will not get lost in what could be, but be active in what is.
Today I will make a list and a schedule and I will stick to it.

Today starts now.